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The Short Story: Over the last few vintages, our packing team pulled aside every bottle with a scuffed, scratched, or slightly wonky label. They’ve been piling up in the warehouse "naughty corner." We desperately need space for Vintage 2026 now. Get 12 perfectly aged, premium $35 reds for just $200. Help us clear the floor!
The Long Story: Let’s pull back the curtain on how the wine industry works. When we pack orders for fine-dining sommeliers and premium bottle shops, they expect absolute visual perfection. A label that is stuck on 2 millimetres to the left? Unsellable. A tiny scuff mark from the cardboard box? Call the authorities. So, over the last few vintages, whenever our packing team spotted a cosmetic flaw—a crooked sticker, a scratch, a weird bubble in the paper—they pulled the bottle off the line and exiled it to a dark, forgotten section of the warehouse we affectionately call "The Naughty Corner."
We thought we'd eventually drink them ourselves. But we just realized that over the past few years, the Naughty Corner has grown from a few boxes into actual pallets of premium, single-vineyard red wine.
Vintage 2026 is wrapping up, our winemakers are running on espresso, and the cellar is currently playing a high-stakes game of Tetris just to find floor space. We literally cannot afford to babysit a mountain of cosmetically challenged wine anymore.
Our logistical hoarding problem is your massive win.
We know you don’t drink the paper. You drink the juice. And because these bottles have been sitting in the naughty corner for a couple of years, they actually have some beautiful bottle-age on them. They are perfectly rested, terroir-driven drops that are practically begging to be opened next to a wood-fired pizza or a massive bowl of pasta.
Because we need them out of our way yesterday, we are boxing them up as a Mystery Dozen at a frankly ridiculous clearance price.
What’s in the box? We’re keeping the exact lineup a secret (mostly because we are just grabbing whatever crooked bottles we can find from the pile), but we guarantee this dozen includes a heavy-hitting mix of our cult-favorite, single-vineyard reds.
The Math (Because we love transparency):
12 x Premium Single-Vineyard Reds (Normally $35+ each)
The "Damage": Purely cosmetic. Ugly on the outside, perfectly aged and beautiful on the inside.
The Price: $200.
The Catch: We are essentially paying you to look past the odd scuff mark so we can fit more tanks in the winery. Once we’ve cleared the Naughty Corner and reclaimed our floor space, this deal is gone forever.
The Short Story: Over the last few vintages, our packing team pulled aside every bottle with a scuffed, scratched, or slightly wonky label. They’ve been piling up in the warehouse "naughty corner." We desperately need space for Vintage 2026 now. Get 12 perfectly aged, premium $35 reds for just $200. Help us clear the floor!
The Long Story: Let’s pull back the curtain on how the wine industry works. When we pack orders for fine-dining sommeliers and premium bottle shops, they expect absolute visual perfection. A label that is stuck on 2 millimetres to the left? Unsellable. A tiny scuff mark from the cardboard box? Call the authorities. So, over the last few vintages, whenever our packing team spotted a cosmetic flaw—a crooked sticker, a scratch, a weird bubble in the paper—they pulled the bottle off the line and exiled it to a dark, forgotten section of the warehouse we affectionately call "The Naughty Corner."
We thought we'd eventually drink them ourselves. But we just realized that over the past few years, the Naughty Corner has grown from a few boxes into actual pallets of premium, single-vineyard red wine.
Vintage 2026 is wrapping up, our winemakers are running on espresso, and the cellar is currently playing a high-stakes game of Tetris just to find floor space. We literally cannot afford to babysit a mountain of cosmetically challenged wine anymore.
Our logistical hoarding problem is your massive win.
We know you don’t drink the paper. You drink the juice. And because these bottles have been sitting in the naughty corner for a couple of years, they actually have some beautiful bottle-age on them. They are perfectly rested, terroir-driven drops that are practically begging to be opened next to a wood-fired pizza or a massive bowl of pasta.
Because we need them out of our way yesterday, we are boxing them up as a Mystery Dozen at a frankly ridiculous clearance price.
What’s in the box? We’re keeping the exact lineup a secret (mostly because we are just grabbing whatever crooked bottles we can find from the pile), but we guarantee this dozen includes a heavy-hitting mix of our cult-favorite, single-vineyard reds.
The Math (Because we love transparency):
12 x Premium Single-Vineyard Reds (Normally $35+ each)
The "Damage": Purely cosmetic. Ugly on the outside, perfectly aged and beautiful on the inside.
The Price: $200.
The Catch: We are essentially paying you to look past the odd scuff mark so we can fit more tanks in the winery. Once we’ve cleared the Naughty Corner and reclaimed our floor space, this deal is gone forever.
