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The Short Story: Over the last few vintages, our packing team pulled aside every bottle with a scuffed, scratched, or slightly wonky label. They’ve been piling up in the warehouse "naughty corner." We desperately need space for Vintage 2027 now. Get 12 reds, over $360 of value, for just $200. Help us clear the floor!
The Long Story: Let’s pull back the curtain on how the wine industry works. When we pack orders for fine-dining sommeliers and premium bottle shops, they expect absolute visual perfection. A label that is stuck on 2 millimetres to the left? Unsellable. A tiny scuff mark from the cardboard box? Call the authorities. So, over the last few vintages, whenever our packing team spotted a cosmetic flaw (a crooked sticker, a scratch, a weird bubble in the paper), they pulled the bottle off the line and exiled it to a dark, forgotten section of the warehouse we affectionately call "The Naughty Corner."
We thought we'd eventually drink them ourselves. But we just realized that over the past few years, the Naughty Corner has grown from a few boxes into actual pallets of premium, mostly single-vineyard red wine.
Vintage 2027 is around the corner, and the cellar is currently playing a high-stakes game of Tetris just to find floor space. We literally cannot afford to babysit a mountain of cosmetically challenged wine anymore.
Our logistical hoarding problem is your massive win.
We know you don’t drink the paper. You drink the juice. They’re drinking beautifully right now, practically begging to be opened next to a wood-fired pizza or a massive bowl of pasta.
Because we need them out of our way yesterday, we are boxing them up as a Mystery Dozen at a frankly ridiculous clearance price.
What’s in the box? We’re keeping the exact lineup a secret, but here’s the shape of it: three bottles each of four reds, and three of the four are single-vineyard.
The Math (Because we love transparency):
12 reds, mostly single-vineyard
Over $360 of value
The "Damage": Purely cosmetic. Ugly on the outside, beautiful on the inside.
The Price: $200. Under $17 a bottle.
The Catch: We are essentially paying you to look past the odd scuff mark so we can fit more tanks in the winery. Once we’ve cleared the Naughty Corner and reclaimed our floor space, this deal is gone forever.
The Short Story: Over the last few vintages, our packing team pulled aside every bottle with a scuffed, scratched, or slightly wonky label. They’ve been piling up in the warehouse "naughty corner." We desperately need space for Vintage 2027 now. Get 12 reds, over $360 of value, for just $200. Help us clear the floor!
The Long Story: Let’s pull back the curtain on how the wine industry works. When we pack orders for fine-dining sommeliers and premium bottle shops, they expect absolute visual perfection. A label that is stuck on 2 millimetres to the left? Unsellable. A tiny scuff mark from the cardboard box? Call the authorities. So, over the last few vintages, whenever our packing team spotted a cosmetic flaw (a crooked sticker, a scratch, a weird bubble in the paper), they pulled the bottle off the line and exiled it to a dark, forgotten section of the warehouse we affectionately call "The Naughty Corner."
We thought we'd eventually drink them ourselves. But we just realized that over the past few years, the Naughty Corner has grown from a few boxes into actual pallets of premium, mostly single-vineyard red wine.
Vintage 2027 is around the corner, and the cellar is currently playing a high-stakes game of Tetris just to find floor space. We literally cannot afford to babysit a mountain of cosmetically challenged wine anymore.
Our logistical hoarding problem is your massive win.
We know you don’t drink the paper. You drink the juice. They’re drinking beautifully right now, practically begging to be opened next to a wood-fired pizza or a massive bowl of pasta.
Because we need them out of our way yesterday, we are boxing them up as a Mystery Dozen at a frankly ridiculous clearance price.
What’s in the box? We’re keeping the exact lineup a secret, but here’s the shape of it: three bottles each of four reds, and three of the four are single-vineyard.
The Math (Because we love transparency):
12 reds, mostly single-vineyard
Over $360 of value
The "Damage": Purely cosmetic. Ugly on the outside, beautiful on the inside.
The Price: $200. Under $17 a bottle.
The Catch: We are essentially paying you to look past the odd scuff mark so we can fit more tanks in the winery. Once we’ve cleared the Naughty Corner and reclaimed our floor space, this deal is gone forever.
